In 2011 I brought a TV to my friend’s cottage so I could watch the first ever “Under the Lights” game through the window from outside. After Denard Robinson scored the 3rd “should be game winning” TD in the last 80 seconds I did a fully clothed front flip off of the edge of the dock in celebration. It was cold… I’m not that athletic… I used to be a sports fan. Since then the fire that was my passion for sports has been slowly fading. Maybe you’ve noticed the decline in the quality and quantity of content on this website.* Maybe you’ve gone through my trash and noticed a lack of TV subscription during sports seasons. (Please don’t do that.. it’s gross). Maybe you’re just generally aware of the overall state of every sports program in the state of Michigan… A breeze will come by and the embers will glow for an instant or two. Beach Volleyball wins gold. Robert Finke passes like 16 guys in the last 30 feet of a thousand mile swim** Yzerman is hired as GM. But all this really does is keep the wood unnoticeably decaying. No flame to admire. No heat to cause anyone to care…
But then someone dropped a gasoline soaked log on the one ember still hot enough to ignite!!! Oh wait let me guess Oh hey, imaginary italicized guy… you’re back? Yeah I guess so. I was having the strangest dream… No you weren’t. You’re not even real. Ouch. That’s mean. Anyway back to what turned you into back into a flaming sports fan…That’s not… whatever. You wanted to guess? Was it that NIL was passed and now college football is going to be fixed? No. NIL is good but college football/NCAA are still bad and that’s a whole other post. Was it The potential return of NCAA Football in 2023**** No. EA sucks and they’ll probably just turn it into Madden 2021. Side note: if they got John Madden to come back and actually announce the game with an AI recreated Pat Summerall I would buy the crap out of that game… I could get behind that… Is Michigan actually going to be good this year? Hell no. EA just dropped the new NHL22 game and it’s actually new/good for the first time sinc… HAHAhahahaha yeah… no. Um…A team of 12 year olds from Taylor Michigan won the Little League World Series? BINGO!!! For the first time since the 1950s a baseball team from Michigan won the little league world series…. …
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Are you f&*$@ng serious?!? Yes! Do you know how damn impressive that is?! They’re from Michigan. A state which gets like 3 months of good baseball weather every year. And half of the time it’s raining or snowing during THOSE months! They had to beat Florida and Texas… And not get Covid when playing Florida and Texas!!! Good one… Thanks… But seriously… watching a bunch of 12 year olds play baseball got you fired up about sports again? I mean professional/college sports ARE about old people watching adults play a kids game… Is it really less acceptable if the kids game is played by actual kids? Whatever… I hope Michigan loses to Western so that I can go back to sleep.
*HEY! I heard that thought you just had! That’s not very nice… I was pretty proud of that Notre Dame is the Duke is the Zach Morris of college football post! I pissed off a good portion of my in-laws with that post… Well I would have had they read it…
**These numbers are 100% accurate.