10/30/2020 I FORGOT THE IMPORTANT SECTION!

So I had started writing the last post before the announcement that Covid-19 was this years Big Ten West Champion. Then something happened. One dumbass voice inspired me. At least briefly, I had a topic about which I was excited to write. A spark ignited. A fire was lit. Once again there was a burning passio…. what? … oh … are you sure? I mean they’re just words… yeah that would be bad… Ok I better safe than sorry I guess. My editor* has warned me than any more inspiration clichés could cause more wildfires in California** So yeah… I had a plan.. and then I forgot to write it. I now realize that this section was missing from the previous post. It was supposed to tie into the Wisconsin section. I call this section the “Puck Faul Pinebaum” section.

For those of you who don’t know: Paul Finebaum the SEC shill who word vomits takes too stupid to be considered “hot.” He’s the one who look Mitch McConnell and Bill Hader’s SNL impression of James Carville were in some kind of horrific “The Fly” style science accident. So Wisconsin announces they have COVID and Paul decides it’s an excellent opportunity to call out the Big Ten’s handling of COVID. “This is what the Big Ten wanted, ‘We’re done, we’re not playing football this year'”… yeah because the Big Ten is notorious for hating money… You can criticize several aspects of the way the Big Ten has handled the season. I’m no going to insult you by pretending the decision was solely based on their noble concerns for their students… Some if it was because forcing a “bubble” environment is both impossible in a college environment and hurts the “Amateurism in college football” argument. Some of it was because myocarditis information was just coming out and they probably didn’t want a 19 year kid die on live TV/in front of a live audience of 114,000***. None of it was because they decided “We just don’t want to play football this year…”

Finebaum went on “And then they were forced back into it because they looked around and they saw Notre Dame playing, and they saw everyone else playing, and they it saw it being successful.” No, Shipdits… The intense pushback from student athletes showed the position of those most affected and the development of Rapid Testing created the opportunity to have a football season without the actual act of football significantly increasing the risk/spread of infection. (Players/coaches get tested daily. Test results come back instantly. Therefore contagious players should be isolated from the team before they have a chance to infect others… Also they’re monitoring myocarditis for anyone who tests positive.) It’s not flawless… A false negative (or Rutgers) could still fubar up the whole thing but it sure seams like it’s a lot less risky than… I don’t know… college? So yeah… did the Big Ten use the new strategies and information to re-evaluate the feasibility of a safe and successful season? Or did they go “Oh well if Notre Dame is playing I guess we have no choice…”

Finally he states “They did this so Ohio State had a legitimate shot at the National Championship.” What?! He’s ripping the Big Ten for imposing a 21 day quarantine instead of 10 or 14. The biggest threat to an undefeated Ohio State IS COVID. Other undefeated/1 loss teams have already played 4 or 6 games… How is potentially eliminating quality wins in an already shortened season going to help OSU get to a national championship? No way a 4-0 OSU team gets in ove… and Minnesota just missed an extra point in overtime. I don’t care anymore… Everyone’s eliminated… Well played 2020.. See ya’ll next year****

*I don’t actually have an editor… Staff budget was all blown on the renewal fees. For Archer fans think of the editor as “Other Barry” For non-Archer fans… watch Archer.

**Also probably cancer… Everything causes cancer in California

***What, aren’t all stadiums that big?

****Just kidding. Stay tuned next week when we talk about how that’s probably PJ Fleck’s fault…

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